Archive for October, 2008

It’s Complicated.

Ok, here it goes…

I miss my blog but I’m seriously busy and just in a strange place to continue to always post happy knitting for now.

I am getting a divorce.  It was a very hard decision to make, but I have been unhappy for a long time.  It’s not that I didn’t love him, because I did and I’ve done everything in my power to be supportive of him and to make this relationship something that works for me, but it doesn’t.

I’ve spent a third of my life with him.  He’s taught me so much.  With him, I skied for the first time, learned a bit about golf and even played a little, went to many concerts, he taught me to expand my taste in foods, taught me how to cook, taught me how to manage a household, and so much more.  I’m not saying I wouldn’t have figured that stuff out on my own or had those experiences another way or with someone else, I’m just saying that I’m thankful for my time with him.  He’s a great person, but this relationship/situation is no longer “right” for me.

After ten years together, four married, I’m going to start thinking more of myself and what I want and need.  It’s been hard.  I’ve grieved this relationship for a long time now, even before saying the words that are leading to the end.  I know I’m doing what’s right for me.

Lately, I’m starting to feel happier again.  I think it’s the promise of a new start that is giving me the energy and excitement I’ve been feeling.  It’s good.

I’m not going to repeatedly post on this topic as some others out there have.  I have kept this blog as more of a happy place, and a place to show my knitting projects and such so I have no intentions of “taking it down” by constantly whining about my divorce.

I also want to say thank you.  I know most of my readers are also my actual friends and I don’t know what I’d do without you all.  No matter how annoying or tiring it is, you still listen when I’m down and encourage me to keep on track.  Every day I am thankful for all of you and every day I am amazed by all of you.

I’ll be back with more knitting when the mojo returns.  Might not be until after the holidays…gotta get busy with the holiday knitting (which I can’t really show you anyway) as there are only 60 days until Christmas!!!


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